Approaching a shy person requires craftsmanship as they can easily be in a difficult position. The fact that such a person doesn’t easily open up or feel comfortable in the crowd doesn’t diminish his/her value as a person.
Three tactics to include a shy person in the group are:
Make the first step
Obviously the ice with a shy person will break at your own initiative for obvious reasons. If you are not willing to make the effort either because of lack of motivation or because of … selfishness then the game is lost. A shy person has trouble getting into a conversation, but at the same time feels disconnected when he/she doesn’t receive interest. So your effort will be appreciated and you will gain impressions. Of course, because the balances are fine even with the first touch, limit yourself to a careful approach without… hugs or other physical contact.
Involve open-ended questions
Questions that can be answered with a yes or no answer are not appropriate to a shy person. On the contrary, open-ended questions that require development, arguments and thinking are useful for a debate. Approaching and breaking the ice is just the beginning, and in order to hold such an individual, it takes effort. Of course, asking these questions requires careful attention so that they aren’t impersonal and they don’t put your interlocutor in a difficult position. Equally important is listening carefully to what the person in front of you has to say in order to build dialogue on them.
Don’t over-analyze
You are a human you, and a shy person is a human too. You are not creatures of a different planet, so a different code of communication is not needed. There is a peculiarity like any other human being, which doesn’t allow them to be easily opened and trusted. A polite approach without much thought is the best recipe, trying to make your interlocutor feel comfortable.
